Wednesday, August 19, 2015

Being Single with a Faith Like Job's

Can I just start by saying being single is pretty much the worst!!! Sorry but I really had to get that out there and off my chest. I get all these people telling me it is the greatest time of my life. Well guess what... You are a bunch of liars. Maybe they aren't, maybe they really do believe that but it is not the reality for me.

Have you ever desired something so much and are completely at a loss on how to achieve it? It's really how I feel right now. I feel as though God placed a desire in my heart young, a desire to be a wife and a mother, but nothing is happening. It's just sitting there growing, getting stronger. Slowly, I'm becoming fixated on how to fulfill that desire.

I thought I met the man I was to marry in college, praise God that didn't happen, but now what. I'll be honest, it's very hard to be in your thirties and single in Wichita. It's not like the bigger cities where there are a plethora of single people. People get married young here, a lot right out of college. (Let me pause here and say I am glad I didn't get married right our of college because I am no where near the same person as I was then.) Most of my friends met their future spouses in college. If they didn't meet them them it wasn't very long after that. I'm now at the stage in my life where friends don't have single friends anymore, and I'm way too old for the bar scene. So what is a girl to do?

When you add being a strong Christian into the mix it makes things about a million times more difficult. I don't want to lower my standards but in dark times it seems like that may be the only option. Even though in my heart I know it isn't. Many nights I have been in tears praying, asking what more am I suppose to be doing? I attend church regularly, I serve faithfully within my church, I pray constantly, I read my Bible, and I have placed my trust for my future in you. What else is there?

No, really what else is there? It's not a formula. You can't take all these things add them up and get 6, or in my case a boy. It doesn't work like that, God doesn't work like that. I begin to really question and examine if I am truly grateful for what he has given me. I have a good job, a roof over my head, food in my stomach, my health, a great family and amazing friends. These are things many people in the world don't have. Am I just hung up on this one thing. While to me it is a VERY big thing, but to God it may just be a small part of my journey, a small part of my story. A story that he has been writing long before I was thought of by my parents, a story that maybe one day will be used to help someone else.

It is very easy to become fixated on the things we don't have, the things we desire, but in doing so we over look the amazing things we do have. I have have this desire in my heart to be a wife and mother, and if it's truly from God then it will come to pass one day. My days need to be praising him and thanking him for the things he has given me. I've been reading in Job a lot the last few days and this reminds me of  his story a little. Although, he had way worse things happen to him then I have! Fortunately for me. Job who in his darkest days, when everything had been taken from him, he remained faithful. He questioned why, he looked to his friends for counsel, but ultimately his faith was what got him through. A faith that God later rewarded. 

So maybe the question shouldn't be what do I have to do for God to give me what I desire, but rather how do I have faith like Job? How in this time of feeling like my greatest desire isn't being answered, do I continue to be faithful? It's an on going process one that I don't pretend to be perfect at and one I will continue to falter with, but the good news is that I'm not doing it alone!


Monday, June 22, 2015

The Magical Weight Loss Secret

So I'm not one to put my weight loss journey out on social media for the world to see. And let me tell you nearly one year later, 50 pounds less and a half marathon in I have some things to brag about (she says very humbly). There is the occasional transformational pictures. You know the ones, you go back find the worst picture of your self at your heaviest, find the skinniest picture of yourself now and in one of those photo editing apps place them next each other. BOOM you have an instant ego and confidence booster. Soak in all those likes, and comments about how great you look! I've added one just to show you what I'm talking about ;)

I've been on the weight loss journey with my best friend, she started about 15/20 pounds less then me, lost it faster, didn't plateau nearly as after, started running before me and hit her goal weight while I still have 30 pounds left to go. Let's just say the jealousy can be raging at times, but I love her and am grateful for her.

Between the two of us we have basically lost a high school girl, 120 pound to be accurate. I'll pause while you do the math to figure out how much she has lost. Got it? Good. For those of you who don't want to do that math that's 70 pounds. Between the two of us we have heard everything there is to hear about losing weight.

The most annoying comment we get ALL THE TIME is "What is your secret?" If one more person asks me that I may punch them in their face. Ok, well maybe not but still! I get it, with all those different supplements programs, fad diets and get skinny fast schemes out there it's easy to hope there is some magical way to get off the weight that took YEARS to put on.

I'm here today to tell you what that secret is. I know right, I'm so awesome to pass this along to everyone. So come close, closer... and I'll tell you. Are you ready?

THERE IS NO SECRET!!!!!!!!!!! What? How can this be? I know, what a let down! Trust me if some how during this process I could have taken a pill and the weight would have just melted off I would have taken it.

It boils down to two very simple and yet incredibly difficult things. Things that we hear all the time and we all guilty of ignoring.

The first, eat less and healthier foods. The healthier part has been beyond painful for me since I'm one of the pickiest eaters I know. Before I was eating out about 5-6 times a week at fast food restaurants around where I work and live. To change this habit I downloaded the MyFitnessPal app and tracked every single thing I put into my mouth. This was awful at first, and I got very hangry. Over time I learned how to eat every couple of hours, making sure I was eating snacks high in fiber or protein to help keep me full.

Secondly, get up and get moving. This started with me purchasing a Fitbit and just getting up and moving around. Instead of calling my boss for something I would walk to his office. Got to get those steps in any way you can! I will warn you this can become quit addicting and if you add friends it can become very competitive. Eventually when I hit yet another plateau I started running. The more ran, the more I saw my weight coming off. It's so weird how that works! I literally was working butt off!

Trust me I'm like every other person out there, it sucked and continues to suck as I work towards getting these last 30 pounds off. But in the end I'm more confident and wearing things that a year ago there is no way I would ever consider wearing.

If you are thinking about making a change know that you can do it! And if you have questions I would be happy to share the very limited knowledge I have gained over this last year. I don't pretend to be an expert by any means. If I was I sure would be making more money!

Until next time...